Times are different now, I have realized.
When I was in Secondary school, we don't fall in love. We have crushes, we have innocent puppy love, or simply just a severe case of LIKE. Now, children as young as primary 5 hold hands. o.0 Needless to say, Secondary school children can even be more experienced in the department of love than me, though I would like to believe that I'm far more rational and matured now.
Of course, I underwent the same course as many of you but it was definitely after Secondary school that I properly had my first taste of love. I used to quiz my Secondary 2 (now Secondary 3) student cum friend cum 'brother', "So next time when you get married, how are you going to tell your wife about how many girlfriends you've had? Or, who will be your REAL first love?" He laughed and said he really didn't think of this so he could not answer me.
Somehow, I have come across many students who have changed partners so frequently, I wonder if they really know what love it all about. I can safely tell you how many boyfriends I've had. I don't have to count fingers and toes and still not get the right number. What about you?
Then, in the midst of changing boyfriends and girlfriends, there will inevitably be the cause of the soured relationship. Of course, there are some ridiculous one who simply break off because the "feel" is no longer there. Others engage in various degrees of quarrels, fights and tear-jerking moments. I feel you, if you come to me and cry or you tell me how things aren't working anymore. I know how it feels. Been there, done that.
“It takes two hands to make a clap”. Well, it does in a relationship. Humans are social animals as they would always need love, company, attention, fulfillment of their needs and so on.
It takes a two way communication process in order to maintain a harmonious relationship. There is no such thing as a one-way love although it may happen in a certain stage of a relationship. Sooner or later, the party would be burnt out. Everyone would like to love and be loved. No one would like a monotonous relationship where both are doing their personal things without any communication all the time. Would you?
‘Opposites attract’. It is this very reason that a man is attracted to a woman and vice versa. (Probably not all the time, but let's just say it happens most of the time.) There is no doubt in my mind that the perfect couple does quarrel. (Which refers to any of you in a relationship.)
There times when you may feel like knocking your head against the wall because she refuses to see that what you say is right and no matter what apology is something that only you have to do, yet you can't part with your pride to do so. Right, this is said in a girl's viewpoint but I really think "sorry" is a powerful word that can pacify an angry soul and soften a terribly upset heart.
As the saying goes, ‘teeth and tongue will meet’, so yes, couples will quarrel and have disagreements but they should be committed to finding a solution or at least a middle ground from which to sort their problems out. Love cannot sustain itself… It takes work. Couples need to appreciate each other and celebrate their differences as well as their commonalities. Granted that things may get boring after some time. Reminisce about the ‘good old days’ when your love was ‘brand new’.
There's no shortcut to this "game" of love, with rules ever-changing and unexpected twists and turns.
Even though I still don't think it's the right time to fall in love, after all, all of you are too young and can hardly be sure of what you exactly want, plus things do change in the future... I still hope you can try your utmost best to make miracles. Make it or break it, it is just a thin line away. Embrace love while you both can for it is too late for regrets should things get way out of hand and beyond cure...
For the rest who are not engaged in a BGR, you can still love! Celebrate love. Be it love of your boyfriend / girlfriend, of your family, of your friends... And you'll be surprised how it may change your life...
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